Monday, December 7, 2009

Bryston's Tree

I haven't been in the holiday spirit, that's no secret, but I did take your advice and decided to put up at least a small tree for Bryston. I didn't and probably wont put up our big tree this year because it just feels like itd be forced. But I do think that Bryston needs to be included in our holiday. I got home the other night from work and Ty had bought a gift for me. It was on the dining room table. I opened it and found the cutest sparrow ornament. So I knew after opening it that I wanted to put on up. Also on the tree I put two ornaments with the letter B on them, and the very first ornament that I bought in August in Alabama while visiting my sister. It is a blue baby ornament with balloons and on the balloons says 2009. All in all I am glad that I put up a tree just for Bryston. I like looking at the lights at night and its somehow peaceful.

The little angle figurine in this photo is holding a little angel baby. We received it in the mail the other day. It came in a box with a little poem attached that read;
When God Calls Little Children
When God calls little children to dwell with him above
We mortals sometimes question the wisdom of his love
For no heartache compares with the death of one small child
Who does so much to make our world seem so wonderful and mild
Perhaps God tires of calling the aged to his fold
So he picks a little rosebud before it can grow old
God knows how much we need them so he takes but a few
To make the land of Heaven more beautiful to view
Believing this is difficult, still, somehow we must try
The saddest word mankind knows will always be goodbye
So when a little child departs we how are left behind
Must realize God loves his children...Angels are hard to find.

The figurine had no return address on it so I have no one to say thank you too, but still whoever you are, thank you, its beautiful and we love it so much we wanted it by his tree.

Also this week I decorated his site. Its not much since there is no headstone but I wanted something there that was festive. I took down his fall decorations, which I'm not sure Ive shared so I will post that picture as well, but I it was hard seeing all the other little graves there decorated. It made me sad to see just how many there are. My heart aches for these families and I wonder how they are navigating through the season with their grief.

Another thing that I got in the mail the other day was from our NILMDTS photographer. It came out of nowhere and I am so grateful that she thought of us! Here is her addition to Bryston's name gallery.

You know, even through it all I still feel so blessed. It's hard sometimes, yes, to see it that way, but deep down I know in my heart that I am. I wish that I could see that everyday. See that through the fog of my grief. I'm trying and I guess that's something.

Cast your burden on the Lord [releasing the weight of it] and He will sustain you; He will never allow the [consistently] righteous to be moved (made to slip, fall, or fail). Psalm 55:22 (AMP)


Missing Kasey said...

Bryson has a very cute tree and decorations. I too put up a small tree for Kasey. ((hugs))

Franchesca Cox said...

The tree for Bryston is so precious. Whoever sent you that angel was incredibly thoughtful. And the card from your photographer is stunning. She did an awesome job. It's nice to have those moments, I am so glad for you that you feel blessed. HUGS!

He & Me + 3 said...

Your tree is adorable and that sign the photographer made is so awesome. What a sweet person to send that to you.

Akul's mama said...

The tree is beautiful.

♥ Ali ♥ said...

You did a wonderful job with both the tree and his little snowman site! I love both, they are so beautiful!

Also, whoever sent that angel must have known that you were hurting this season; what a touching thing to do for someone...So sweet. <3

Jill said...

The tree is wonderful and I love the ornaments with the letter B for Bryston. His site looks wonderful decorated for the season! The angel figurine that someone sent you is precious. What a nice gift. I also love Bryston's name from the photographer. How sweet of her!

Nan & Mike said...

What beautiful tributes to your sweet angel boy, he knows you are always thinking of him! I find I am having a bit of a hard time also decorating and shopping and such, but you do what you can, and try to hold on. Prayers and hugs to you sweetie, Nan xoxoxo

Tiffany said...

I'm so proud of you for finding it in you to set up and decorate a tree for Bryston. I love the "B" ornaments. My favorite is the red one with the green lowercase b.
I have faith that you will find your way out of the rut. Praying for you always.

JamieW said...

You are doing such a beautiful job remembering your son. I really like the way the tree turned out.

Katie said...

Jennifer ~
I love Bryston's tree. It is beautiful. Thank you for sharing this with us.

His name gallery pic from your nilmdts is beautiful!

You are precious, and we feel SO many of the same feelings.

I love how you decorated Bryston's sight, too. You are a good mama.

Let's hang in there together over Christmas...I'm dreading it!

Andrea said...


Hello, I am Andrea and am stopping by from Nan's blog. So sorry the holidays are hard for you, they are hard for me as well. I had no desire to put up a tree, as my EDD was Dec. 2nd, and I feel a bit blue. However, I wanted to honor Christian and decided to put up our tree for him...its beautiful and such a soothing reminder of my angel. I pray for you and I pray for me and all the baby lost mama's out there who are navigating our lives the best we can. And, more than anything, I pray that we come to know peace.

visti my blog if you like www.persuitofourfairytale.blogspot.come

Love and Prayers...

Holly said...

I really love Bryston's tree and his decorations by his grave. It's nice to be able to have a small tree for them. Yours looks much better than mine! I just have a few ornaments hanging with no garland or bulbs. I really like the fiber optic lights though.

Jess said...

Bryston's tree is so beautiful, I love his special ornaments! I wanted to tell you, I've been making some ornaments, and did one for Bryston. If you would like me to send it to you, just e-mail me your address at You can see what they look like on my blog.:) said...

I love the tree. A great way to focus on your little Bryston through this holiday season.

His grave site decorations are wonderful too.


Once A Mother said...

Wow, i have so much to say. first that tree is a perfect way to honor your sweet little Bryston this Christmas. I have not yet done my Peyton tree, I want to but have been feeling weighed down by the thought of it, seeing yours motivates me because as painful as it is to have a babyloss tree, it is perfect and beautiful. how wonderful that you received that angel statue. what a generous and sweet gift. i love the way you have the grave decorated. your fall decorations were so cute, and i love the let it snow snowman. sending you love and prayers as the holidays approach.