tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post1595492668132789217..comments2023-07-01T03:15:10.516-05:00Comments on The Blue Sparrow: The Blue Sparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08196234778836756227noreply@blogger.comBlogger20125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-2578758561096943982009-12-18T01:00:40.277-06:002009-12-18T01:00:40.277-06:00I know that the others have said it above, but wri...I know that the others have said it above, but writing will help decrease some of the anxiety about forgetting.<br /><br />*hugs*wife.mom.nursehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16161476116382515206noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-24573895704245663502009-12-16T17:46:36.179-06:002009-12-16T17:46:36.179-06:00I'm sorry, I know I am afraid of forgetting al...I'm sorry, I know I am afraid of forgetting all the little details too. That's why I have written so dang much about everything and took so many pictures. I don't think it would've mattered how much you held him, it still wouldn't have been enough time. You never want to let them go.Hollyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15431384515813384025noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-16570578529237506442009-12-16T15:59:47.367-06:002009-12-16T15:59:47.367-06:00Jennifer ~ You are a wonderful mother to Bryston, ...Jennifer ~ You are a wonderful mother to Bryston, and he is so proud of you.<br /><br />You did the very best you could in those circumstances of tremendous stress. <br /><br />Love you and giving you a big hug.Katiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13225522064810068822noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-53832283861540169562009-12-16T13:27:36.213-06:002009-12-16T13:27:36.213-06:00Thinking of you!!! I remember forgetting things a...Thinking of you!!! I remember forgetting things and being so angry- that's why I write. Write it all down- every memory and somehow by reading it back it cements it... I had a picture of what Andrew looked like- my memory of seeing him. Pictures taken after his death were not that same picture- and in a sense they replaced my memory and I hated that!! Sending HUGS!!!<br />On this journey with you!<br />LLaurahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09451958236636719292noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-69936627572994129712009-12-15T17:33:43.604-06:002009-12-15T17:33:43.604-06:00You are a wonderful mommy!! You honor your beautif...You are a wonderful mommy!! You honor your beautiful angel constantly and help other mommies in the process! Bryston is blessed to have a mommy who cares so much and loves him so & one day he'll get to tell you that and hug you so tight you'll know you never forgot one detail about him!!Denihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16241957159520703116noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-63152435916800208522009-12-15T17:19:59.335-06:002009-12-15T17:19:59.335-06:00The color of his blanket is the hue of a mother...The color of his blanket is the hue of a mother's perfect love :)brianhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01496451928209950915noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-59591073703578945262009-12-15T15:49:51.654-06:002009-12-15T15:49:51.654-06:00Jennifer you are NOT a failure!! Bryston knows yo...Jennifer you are NOT a failure!! Bryston knows you love him with everything you have! I know the importance of every little thing and time we spent is very important, but please don't beat yourself up. I too have similar things I wish that I would have done, I didn't document every little thing, and took very few pictures... 4, 6, and 8 months were very very hard for me too. Sending you lots of love and hugs!Christmas with Kaseyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04046209441729981789noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-83434262559689143642009-12-15T08:39:25.722-06:002009-12-15T08:39:25.722-06:00Jennifer,
Your pain is so real. I am so sorry th...Jennifer, <br />Your pain is so real. I am so sorry that you are feeling this way. Don't for one second feel guilty in anyway. Guilt is not of God. God hears your cries and he will comfort you. Bryston is blessed to have a mommy like you. <br />Hugs,<br />DestinyDaddy's Dream ~Mommy's Miraclehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06036048241322226389noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-52760523552537648602009-12-15T00:49:28.654-06:002009-12-15T00:49:28.654-06:00Thinking of you, Jennifer. You love Bryston as his...Thinking of you, Jennifer. You love Bryston as his devoted mother and I'm sorry that you are pained by not remembering this detail about his blanket. I think we have to be kind to ourselves because the shock of losing a child is so overwhelming and the time we had with them so brief. I feel the same way, wishing I could go back and take more time. xoKarenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01771397595613026711noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-89961537604999942232009-12-14T23:32:36.437-06:002009-12-14T23:32:36.437-06:00You know my one BIG regret - when Akul was born - ...You know my one BIG regret - when Akul was born - fresh out of my womb- I did not hold him. I was shaking so much from the anesthesia that I was afraid I will drop him...he was so tiny that I was scared I would crush him. If at that time I knew that I would have him for just a few days, I would hold him close when he was so alive and active. I would have not let him go anywhere. I thought I would be patient because I would have a life time with him...little did I know. Hugssssssssss... we have so many regrets.Akul's mamahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02731802741502891348noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-5608055030157303152009-12-14T23:32:13.657-06:002009-12-14T23:32:13.657-06:00You know my one BIG regret - when Akul was born - ...You know my one BIG regret - when Akul was born - fresh out of my womb- I did not hold him. I was shaking so much from the anesthesia that I was afraid I will drop him...he was so tiny that I was scared I would crush him. If at that time I knew that I would have him for just a few days, I would hold him close when he was so alive and active. I would have not let him go anywhere. I thought I would be patient because I would have a life time with him...little did I know. Hugssssssssss... we have so many regrets.Akul's mamahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02731802741502891348noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-66621560090668621442009-12-14T20:15:44.321-06:002009-12-14T20:15:44.321-06:00You are a wonderful, loving mommy to your Bryston....You are a wonderful, loving mommy to your Bryston. I am sorry you can't remember the color of his blanket. There are small details that are slipping in my mind too and I hate myself for it too. I wish it weren't so. Have you journaled about the memories you did have? That helped me. There is so much I thought I would remember and when I go back and read my memories, I realize there is so much I have forgotten. <br /><br />What I wouldn't do for more time too. I remember Jenna getting cold and it was so painful to feel the warmth of her body escaping. I feel your pain. <br /><br />Praying for you tonight. <br /><br />XOFranchescahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08362049658761399255noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-8712963957382576872009-12-14T20:12:24.260-06:002009-12-14T20:12:24.260-06:00Jennifer,
So sorry that you are hurting and reliv...Jennifer,<br /><br />So sorry that you are hurting and reliving this deep pain again. Know that you are not and never will be a failure as Bryston's Mommie...never.<br /><br />I understand all of your wishes...just know that you did everything right "in that moment" And, know that you will NEVER forget his smell or how he felt when you held him in your arms. But more than anything, he lives on in your heart forever.<br /><br />Praying for you sweet friend that peace comes your way. I only wish I could take this hurt from you.<br /><br />Andrea<br />xoxoAndreahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06709001842788289402noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-38614771867038791982009-12-14T20:05:17.234-06:002009-12-14T20:05:17.234-06:00I am heartbroken reading this. Even though Peyton&...I am heartbroken reading this. Even though Peyton's passing was at a month old, so much of my experience after she drew that last breath is the same as you wrote here. I am so, so sorry that any of us know what it is to feel our children go cold. I too felt like i had to hand her over, or I never could. And I too worry that she is cold below the earth. Sending prayers of understanding your way. I am so, so sorry.Once A Motherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15974149780531831971noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-35482854979080839772009-12-14T15:49:34.616-06:002009-12-14T15:49:34.616-06:00I am so sorry that you have those regrets too. I ...I am so sorry that you have those regrets too. I didn't ask to see her again before I left the hospital and now I wish I had those moments back. Praying for peace and strength for you.Danahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16045462734511131862noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-75530173445654849232009-12-14T15:15:41.458-06:002009-12-14T15:15:41.458-06:00WOW, everything you said rings true for me too! Th...WOW, everything you said rings true for me too! There are so many "I wish" thoughts going through my head. But at that point in time we were doing what we thought was best and what we could handle. My big regret is not taking pictures while holding Elliot. The nurse had started to and at that point in time I thought it was soooo insensitive, I actually started screaming at her! I wish now I had those. I also wish we would have taken some at the funeral home. Elliot looked so beautiful, not damaged, not like he had suffered, but perfect.<br />HUGS to you that these "wishes" start to fade and we smile at the time we did have....(easier said than done, I know!)ForeverElliot'sMommyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06415623315190480978noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-51761731477497004762009-12-14T15:10:17.222-06:002009-12-14T15:10:17.222-06:00Jennifer, I am sorry that you are feeling sad, but...Jennifer, I am sorry that you are feeling sad, but wanted to say that even if you forget his blanket, you will never forget how you felt holding him, you will never forget the love you have for him, you won't ever forget the hopes and dreams you had for him, and you will never forget him, so try not to be down when you forget things like his blanket color. I am sending you extra love today and just knw that your angel is looking down on you. Hugs<br />shandreaShandreahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09940325534777199906noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-43303270565052094432009-12-14T13:58:29.334-06:002009-12-14T13:58:29.334-06:00The corners and edges may soften so that they dont...The corners and edges may soften so that they dont hurt so much, but you will never forget. I know that I too wish that I had held and spent more time with Cady than I did, and I regret it, but I think that we all do what we can handle at that particular time.<br /><br />Thinking of you today.Allison (Ali)https://www.blogger.com/profile/00731485021895799034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-57482575121398625052009-12-14T13:48:30.317-06:002009-12-14T13:48:30.317-06:00Jennifer,
I'm so sorry! I think the 4th and 5t...Jennifer,<br />I'm so sorry! I think the 4th and 5th months were the hardest on me so far. I have to share that I have similar regrets. I don't know why I didn't hold her longer than 2 hours. And, when the brought her back to see me in the evening, I kissed her, told her how sorry I was and then handed her back. It was all so much at the time. I also wish I would have taken pictures with her. I just have the ones the nurses took in the back. My mind races like yours too. I wish I had a way to help you cope. Early on, I did pop anxiety pills when I couldn't take it any longer. But, eventually I realized I couldn't do that forever. Hang in there. We did the best we could at the time. And, I'm sure our babies are proud of us. Hugs!Breehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03894396436704042272noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6857127480909271511.post-67888675173311861482009-12-14T13:42:45.467-06:002009-12-14T13:42:45.467-06:00When it comes to Dylan and the time that we were b...When it comes to Dylan and the time that we were blessed to spend with him, I am mortified by the fear that as the days, months, and years tick away, that I am forgetting the details.<br /><br />Nothing scares me more . . . hugs to you! How I wish these weren't the details that we struggle to remember! Kat <a href="http://www.indylansmemory.blogspot.com/" rel="nofollow">In Dylan's Memory</a>Jus and Kathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07757430676211108344noreply@blogger.com